It is the attribute of the strong .you taught me that but the lessons
ended before we ever got to the rational side of things

which, stale as it takes everything you have just to say the word…

I turned into one of those people who did not know the difference
between real and make-believe and was afraid of both.

I walked around not stepping on cracks because I honestly
thought the sidewalk was going to swallow me whole.

Why wouldn’t something terrible happen, again?

It’s done—over, as they say—because I, for one, can still hear the
memories of our home. They are perfect only in their clarity.

I’ve learned, from you, courage does not exist. It’s just desperation
and good will clear the bitterness away and can even set
a prisoner free.

I’ve heard, though not from you, of course,
the opposite of love is not hate.

Even so, I’m amazed how a well placed word can change
the entire course of a life.
It’s incredible when you get down to the meat of it;
we spend so much of ourselves

waiting to hear words we know don’t exist anymore,
not for us anyways.
For us, these are places we can’t return to;
things we’re not going to do.

I think of you, in case you didn’t know, despite everything.
I don’t know why, only that I’ll never know.

It’s a cold understanding that I’m thankful and afraid of because
it reminds me I’ll never forget and I wanted to be a better person than this.


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